About Abas Alhassan
The author brings a unique and deeply personal perspective to the conversation about relationships, marriage, and family. Born and raised in Nigeria within a polygamous household, he experienced first-hand the complexities, richness, and challenges of traditional African family structures. This upbringing provided him with invaluable insights into the dynamics of extended families, multiple relationships under one roof, and the intricate web of cultural expectations that shape how we love and live together.
Through his own cross-cultural marriage and the over 35 years of experience of raising children, he gained practical wisdom that cannot be found in textbooks. Not content to rely solely on personal experience, he conducted comprehensive research surveying 225 respondents from both the United States and Africa. This research forms the empirical backbone of this book, providing data-driven insights into what really matters in relationships across cultures. The survey revealed surprising similarities and important differences in how couples on two continents view love, finance, religion, trust, and the fundamental building blocks of lasting partnerships.
As a professional who has worked in several countries across the world, he understands the practical challenges couples face in balancing career demands, cultural expectations, religious commitments, and the day-to-day realities of building a life together. His insights come not from ivory tower theories but from the trenches of real relationships, real conflicts, and real triumphs.
This book represents decades of observation, experience, research, and reflection. It is written with the humility of someone who has made mistakes and learned from them, the confidence of someone who has successfully navigated raising children and managing relationships, and the generosity of someone who wants to help others avoid the pitfalls while embracing the possibilities that cross-cultural relationships offer.
Whether you are planning to go into a relationship, preparing for marriage, strengthening an existing relationship, navigating cultural differences with your partner, or simply seeking to understand the universal principles that sustain love across continents and generations, the author’s unique perspective offers something valuable. His voice is authentic, his research is solid, and his commitment to helping couples build strong, lasting relationships is evident on every page.